TMNT: Missing: Chapter 6 - Truth and Pain (final)

Chapter 6: Truth and Pain (final chapter)

“You happy Leo? You really wanted know what happened,” Donnie said, “why’d you want to find out so bad?” Donnie asked evenly.

Leo sighed, “I’m the leader, we got separated, Mikey got captured and nearly got killed, it shouldn’t happened, it’s my fault.”

“Leo how can you say that? You don’t even know what really happened. Even Mikey was not sure,” Donnie said.

“You’re not the leader, you don’t get it,” Leo said.

“But Mikey is our brother,” Raph cut in, “you think we don’t feel guilty for what happened to Mikey? We were three too, it could have been any of us!” Raph’s voice was firm, but he did not yell. He looked down at Mikey who was tucked back into his shell.

“Mikey come out of there,” Donnie begged.

“I’ll get the pizza,” Raph said. When he came back he placed the slice in front of Mikey. Slowly Mikey’s head poked out of his shell and sniffed. Slowly he extended his arms and legs. Mikey picked up the pizza and slowly ate it. “There ya go Mikey, eat up.”

Leo sat down next to Mikey, “Mikey, I’m sorry I shouldn't have asked you.” Leo tried to look Mikey in eyes, but Mikey refused to meet his brother’s gaze.

“Leo, you don’t know what it was like. I hope you never know what it’s like,” Mikey looked at his feet. There was a long silence, Mikey began to play with his fingers. “They hit me, everyday. They asked me where sensei was,” Mikey gulped, “and when I would not tell them, they hit me. Sometimes they cut me.”

“Mikey, you don’t have to go on,” Donnie said gently.

“Sometimes I did not know if I was waking up from sleeping or because they knocked me out. Two times they cut me so bad they brought in this doctor, I saw him once.”

“Mikey,” Donnie said.

“I can tell you the story behind every bruise and every cut. Except for this one, Mikey rubbed the back of his head. When I woke up in the cell I had it. It hurt so bad I could not sit up for a few days.”

“Mikey!” Donnie was trying to stop Mikey.

“They kicked me when they wanted me to eat. I think it was also a way to make sure I was not dead,” Mikey sighed again, he was now picking at a stray thread on his blanket, “towards the end I almost wanted to die. I was sick of being hurt I just wanted. . .” Mikey stopped when Leo pulled him into a hug.

“Mikey we would have missed you too much. I’m glad you fought back,” Leo said, releasing Mikey from the hug.

“None of this is your fault,” Donnie said.

“Then--then why does it feel like it-it’s all my fault?” Mikey whispered.  

“That’s because you are the victim,” Donnie said, “just remember it’s not your fault.”

“But Donnie what if I asked for it?” Mikey said.

“Mikey--” Raph started.

“Just listen to me! After that flash of lightning I was not alone,” Mikey was looking Donnie in the eyes, “you guys were there, there was a fight. I don’t remember the fight, all I remember is that you guys were knocked out and I could not find my nunchaku anywhere.”

“Mikey what are you talking about?” Leo said.

“They wanted to kill us all...I-I begged them to take me….I knew it meant I may never see you again….but….better than…” Mikey collapsed into Leo’s arms.

“You let them take you so they would not kill us?” Leo asked. Mikey nodded, he brought his knees to his plastron, he was crying so hard he was having a hard time breathing. Leo rubbed his brother’s carapace his fingers moved over the crack on his back. Mikey cried his himself to sleep in Leo’s arms.

Donnie looked down at Mikey sleeping in Leo’s arms, it was a very unsettled sleep. Donnie sighed, “When he came home I saw the cuts and bruises, I never though it was that bad.”

“He saved our lives,” Raph said.

Leo looked down at Mikey, “it should have been me. I should have been protecting us. Mikey should not have been the one with that decision.” Mikey started whimpered in his sleep.

“The fact is he did, and we can’t change that,” Donnie said.  

“Yeah,” Leo sighed placing his hand on Mikey’s head, “he sweating, and warm,” Leo said.

“Leo would never say that,” Mikey whimpered, then he started to take in deep gasping breaths. Mikey tightly held onto Leo’s arm, “how-how could you think he would?” Mikey voice cracked, “he’s my brother….” Mikey started to cough. Leo shifted his hold on Mikey.

“What did they say to him?” Raph said, looking down at his brother.

Donnie knelt down next to Mikey, “what did they say Leo said?”

“Not to come home,” he said weakly, he opened his eyes and looked up at Leo.

“You didn’t say that right?” Mikey’s voice broke.

“Course not Mikey,” Leo said holding Mikey tighter.

“It-it was on my T-Phone,” Mikey wheezed out, he closed his eyes.

“Why don’t you go back to sleep Mikey,” Leo said going to lay him on his pillows.

“Don’t leave me,” Mikey said nestling himself in Leo’s arms. Leo leaned back against the wall. Donnie brought the blanket over them.

“I won’t Mikey. I will stay here as long as you need,” Leo said.

“We all will,” Donnie said.

“Yeah we owe you for saving our shells,” Raph smiled.

“Then can you make me a promise?” Mikey asked

“Yeah what is it?” Raph said.

“Don’t hit me for a while ‘kay?” Mikey gave Raph a weak smile.

“Sure, buddy,” Raph said giving Mikey a smile.

It was not long before Mikey was sound asleep in Leo’s arms.

“If I was in Mikey’s place I would have done the same thing,” Donnie said.

“Me too,” Raph said, “I wish I could trade places with him,” Raph whispered the last part.

Leo sighed, “yeah but it was Mikey who has to make it, we made that deal that Mikey would not get hurt, that we would protect him.”

“You mean our deal we never told Mikey about?” Raph said.

“Yeah that one,” Leo said, “we made that deal when were like what seven? When he got really scared in the sewers.”
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Donnie quietly entered Mikey’s room. Leo was sleeping on his side with Mikey curled up next to him, Leo had an arm draped over Mikey. Donnie gently shook Leo awake, “it’s time for practice,” he said. Leo sat up he looked down and Mikey. “You don’t want to leave him alone,” Donnie said.

“No,” Leo said placing a hand on Mikey’s shoulder.

“I’m sure sensei will understand if you want to skip traning today,” Donnie said.

“No, I need to train. I missed too much already,” Leo slipped out of Mikey’s bed. Using extra blankets and pillows Leo built a nest around Mikey, so that he would still be warm. Despite Leo, leaving Mikey did not seem to notice.

Halfway through practice Mikey appeared at the door. “I’m just here to watch,” he said quietly. Splinter nodded to his son. Mikey smiled as he knelt down. Even though he was not practicing with his brothers it felt good to be back in the dojo with his father and brothers.

“Yame!” Splinter called out for the last time that day. Raph and Donnie went over to Mikey and helped bring him to his feet, despite his protests.

“Come on Mikey let’s get some breakfast,” Leo said walking beside Mikey, “and after breakfast we can go for a walk in the sewers.”
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Leo was slowly walking beside Mikey kicking stones as he went, most of the trip was in silence.

“Leo how long did it take your ankle to heal?” Mikey asked.

“Two months, but mine was fracture,” Leo said turning to Mikey.

“Did you do any training during that time?” Mikey asked, “I am already three months behind, and two months for this thats almost six months.” Mikey sifted uncomfortably.  

“I need to sit, my ankle still get sore sometimes,” Leo said. Mikey nodded as he sat down next to Leo. He brought his good leg to his plastron stretching out his injured one. Leo placed an arm around his brother’s shoulders.

“I was afraid I would never see you again,” Mikey suddenly broke out crying. Leo was caught off guard. “I didn’t think through what would happen if they took me. I just wanted to save you guys,” Mikey took deep heaving breaths, “I missed you guys so much.” Leo pulled Mikey closer to him, “I never want to be alone again.”

Leo’s lips turned into a sad smile, “I will make sure, you are never alone.”

Mikey’s body twitched, “promise?”

“Yeah, Mikey I promise,” Leo said holding Mikey even tighter.

“Can you tell me a story?” Mikey asked, his voice was almost child like. He was picking at a scab on his arm.

“What kind of story?” Leo asked.

“When we were younger, I was too painful to think of home…..so I did not want to think about it...so I guess I forgot somethings…”

Leo looked sadly at his brother, “yeah Mikey, um how about the time you busted Raph and me when you spoke your first word?” Leo said.

“Huh?” Mikey said.

“Well it back when we did not have a lot to eat, so we rationed out food. Raph and me were hungry so we snuck some food. You were in the room coloring, Raph said it would be okay to do it in front of you since you did not talk yet. Once we started eating you got up and ran off to get Splinter. Well, Splinter had a hard time understanding you sometimes and were so desperate to bust us that you said your first word,” Leo said.

“What was my first word?” Mikey asked.

Leo chuckled, “It was food,” Leo smiled.

Mikey laughed, “really?”

“Yeah, when Splinter came in he saw we made quite the mess. Before Splinter could get us in trouble you said your second word, well you miss spoke it a little, but it was close enough. You said ‘Twouble’ --Trouble. Man we go in so much trouble. You and Donnie cried all afternoon cause we ate all the lunch.” Leo laugh, “Splinter was so mad at us.”

“You got in trouble?” Mikey laughed.

“Yeah, I did,” Leo said, “come on let’s get back to the lair it’s time for lunch,” Leo helped Mikey to his feet. “Mikey you want a ride back to the lair?” Leo asked.

“A ride on what?” Mikey asked.

“Me,” Leo crouched down and motioned for Mikey to climb on. Tentatively Mikey climbed on. Leo ran Mikey back all the way to the lair, a small smile spread across Mikey’s face. When they got back to the lair Leo brought Mikey to the couch. He walked over to where Raph and Donnie were so that he could tell them what he learned about Mikey.

“He probably just suppressed them, he still has them in his memory, he just needs some help remembering them,” Donnie said.
----
After lunch Leo and Raph went off to the dojo to spar and Donnie went to his lab with Mikey. Donnie went to his work bench he making modifications to the T-Phone. Mikey was absentmindedly stating at Donnie.  Mikey was only in there with his brother only because he wanted to company.

“Donnie can you tell me a story about when we were younger?” Mikey looked sad, “I want to remember, but I can’t,” he looked down at his feet.

“You will, you brain just locked your memories away for a little while,” Donnie tried to give Mikey a reassuring smile, “don’t worry we find the right memory and you will remember.”

“Oh,” Mikey said simply, “so do you have a story for me?”

“Yeah, I do I have the perfect one,” Donnie smiled. “We were really young maybe four or so. I was sick, and you wanted to take care of me. You really wanted to read to me, but you did not know how,” Donnie chuckled. “It took you over half and hour to read me ‘The Three Little Pigs’, but you did it. After you read to me we ate lunch. You got all sticky and then hugged me, making me sticky too. Sensei had give us a bath. You tackled me in the tub,” Donnie smiled.

“Donnie I want to remember those times….not….well...you know…” Mikey’s voice broke, “I don’t want to remember what they did to me….”

Donnie did not know what to say. He looked at his crying brother with tears in is own eyes, he pulled Mikey into a tight hug.

“I’m sorry I hurt you guys,” Mikey sobbed.

“Mikey--”

“It was me who attacked you guys,” he choked out.

“Mikey what are you talking about?” Donnie asked as Mikey’s sobs grew harder.

“I don’t….want to….remember that…that night but….I do.”  Donnie could hardly understand his brother, “I-I ‘membered some-something new…” Mikey’s body began to shake form crying.

“Mikey, calm down,” Donnie said, “deep breaths talk to me.”

“Donnie what’s going on?” Leo asked.

“I don’t really know, get sensei and Raph…” Donnie said. Leo nodded is head and turned around to get his brother and father.
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Splinter led his two eldest sons back into Mikey’s room. Splinter sat down on the bed and took Mikey from his brother’s arms. “Michelangelo, what is going on?”

“I-I hurt my brothers….th-that night on patrol….” Mikey sobbed out. Raph went to say something, but Splinter held his hand up for him to stop. “We were fighting I was surrounded by the Foot, I could not see any of you,” Mikey took a deep breath, “they tripped me; I fell. Then I felt a sharp pain in my neck. Everything was burry; I was dizzy.” Mikey closed his eyes, “When opened my eyes I had no control over my body. I-I felt like was a puppet…”

“Take your time my son,” Splinter soothed. Mikey made a strange chocking sound.

“I-I tried to fight it, but if I-I tried to stop...it was painful,” Mikey cried, “but then…..when I was done...I saw them, just laying there and the Foot were going…..“my fault,” he continued to cry, “my memory keep changing…..I don’t know what’s true anymore...sorry….”

Leo looked down at his brother. He was crying and shaking, his breathing was ragged. Leo would give anything to trade places with his brother.

“No one blames you my son,” Splinter said trying to sooth his distraught son.

“I-in the end...I went with them to-to save you guys…..” Splinter gently rocked Mikey liked he did when he was a child. Mikey was soon sleeping.

Splinter stood up. Leo placed a pillow in the center of the bed, Splinter gently laid Mikey on his plastron so he was laying on the pillow. Raph brought the covers over Mikey while Donnie tucked Mikey’s worn and tattered stuffed orange stuffed cat under his hand.
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It was a long recovery to Mikey. With the help of his brothers and father they would help him. Donnie told him it would several years before the crack on his plastron would heal, but the emotional scars would never heal. Every time Mikey saw Karai, he would see the jail cell. He would see the drawing of his brothers he drew in his own blood, he saw his tally marks, the eighteen sets of five marks.